Losing a pet, especially one that has been an integral part of the family for years, is an experience fraught with deep emotional turmoil and grief. While there is broad understanding of the profound loss of a family member, most people have much less understanding of how deeply the loss of a family pet affects those left behind.
My song "Until Then" was written as a heartfelt tribute to the basset hounds that brought joy, companionship, and unconditional love into our lives over 15 years. The journey with our beloved pets has been a tapestry of memories filled with happiness, shared experiences, and the profound bond we shared with each of them.
The Story Behind the Song
Our journey began in Wales with two basset hound puppies, Samson and Delilah, who quickly became cherished members of our family. Over the years, we also fostered and rehomed several other basset hounds—Sonny, Rufus, Pluto, Rascal, and Jessie. Each dog brought its own unique personality and quirks, enriching our lives in countless ways.
Sonny's story, in particular, stands out. After a failed rehoming attempt, he returned to us, broken and in need of immense care and love. The bond we formed with Sonny was extraordinary, as we worked with the nervous and somewhat dangerous dog he had become, watching him blossom into a happy, loving dog. His resilience and gentle spirit, if somewhat still grumpy nature, left an indelible mark on us.
When Delilah and then Samson passed away at the age of 12, Sonny was left alone. To ease his loneliness (and frankly ours), we adopted Ruby and Sherlock, an older pair of basset hounds whose previous owner could no longer care for them. Tragically, Ruby succumbed to heart failure a few weeks after coming into our care, but Sherlock stayed with us for about a year and a half before passing away. A few months later, Sonny also passed away.
The Creation of "Until Then"
The loss of each dog was a heart-wrenching experience, leaving our home quieter and our hearts heavier each time. I realised that while there are many songs about the loss of a family member or loved one, there are very few that capture the unique grief of losing a dog. For a great many people, dogs are more than just pets; they are family members who offer unconditional love and companionship, often becoming our confidants and sources of comfort.
"Until Then" was born out of this need to express the profound sorrow and emptiness that follows the loss of a beloved pet. The lyrics reflect the daily reminders of their absence—the silence where their laughter used to spill, the leash hanging unused by the door, and the fur still clinging to the rug. These details capture the lingering presence of a pet that has passed, highlighting the deep bond we shared with them.
Exploring the Lyrics
Verse 1:
"The house doesn't creak the same, no pause upon the floor
Each corner filled with shadows where you once would snore
I come home to silence where laughter used to spill
In the quiet of the evening, I miss you still"
This verse captures the immediate changes in the home environment after a pet's loss. The familiar sounds and sights, like the creaks of the house and the shadows where they used to sleep, are now haunting reminders of their absence. Coming home to silence, where there used to be laughter and activity, is one of the hardest adjustments. These lines convey the void left behind and how every evening is a reminder of the missing joy.
Verse 2:
"Your leash hangs by the door just like any other day
But there's no joyful barking, no games left to play
My feet find your fur still clinging to the rug
Each strand a whispered memory, a soft heartbroken hug"
The second verse focuses on the tangible reminders of the pet. The leash by the door and the absence of joyful barking underline the daily routine disruptions. Finding fur on the rug is a bittersweet experience; it's a physical reminder of their presence, offering comfort while also breaking the heart. Each strand of fur feels like a lingering embrace, a memory that whispers the times shared.
Chorus:
"In the silence of your wake, I wander through each room
Feeling echoes of your love now swallowed by the gloom
How I long for one more moment, one more wag of your tail
In the hush of my heart, where you left your trail"
The chorus speaks to the emotional void and the aimless wandering through the house, searching for the echoes of the pet's love. The desire for one more moment, one more wag of the tail, captures the longing and the difficulty in accepting their absence. The hush of the heart is where the pet's memory lingers, leaving a lasting trail of their presence.
Verse 3:
"Night stretched into empty, the clock ticks out your song
Each tick a step away from you, each tock feels so wrong
The space beside my bed is cold, bereft of your warm light
I reach out into darkness, missing you each night"
Nights are especially tough after losing a pet. The ticking clock becomes a painful reminder of time moving forward without them. The empty space beside the bed is a stark contrast to the warmth and comfort they used to provide. Reaching out into the darkness, only to find it cold, captures the deep sense of loneliness that comes with their absence.
Bridge:
"They say time will ease the pain and soon I'll find my way
But they never knew the heartbeat at my feet, each day
You were more than just a pet, You were family, my friend
In the quiet of this house, I can't pretend"
The bridge challenges the notion that time heals all wounds. People often say that the pain will ease, but they might not understand the deep bond shared with a pet. The heartbeat at my feet each day was a constant source of comfort and companionship. The pet was more than just an animal; they were family and a true friend. This connection makes it impossible to pretend that everything is okay in the quiet of the house.
Conclusion:
"In the silence of your wake, I trace where you would tread
Every corner holds a story, every space a bed
How I ache for your soft nuzzle, your gentle trusting eyes
In the stillness of this life, where your memory lies
So I'll sit here in this silence, letting tears freely flow
For the love that you gave me, for the joy you let me know
And I'll hold on to the moments, till I feel you nudge again
In the whispers of the wind, ... until then"
The conclusion brings together the themes of memory, longing, and love. Tracing the pet's steps through the house, remembering the stories in every corner, and missing their soft nuzzle and trusting eyes all speak to the depth of the bond. Sitting in silence and letting the tears flow is a way of honouring the love and joy they brought into life. The hope of feeling their presence again, even in the whispers of the wind, offers a comforting thought until the day of reunion.
Since releasing the song on the album, 'The Skin We Wear', it has been well received with almost 5,000 plays in the last two months.
If you've lost a four legged family member, please try it and hopefully you'll find a moment of quiet reflection in the words - Until Then
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